Spanish Jokes Collection!

My 85+ favorite Spanish Jokes

Spanish jokes are are very effective in helping you learn Spanish. Why? - Because it is a lot of fun to dive into the Spanish language and culture like that. Jokes have always been popular with my students and I keep using Spanish Jokes and Riddles in my lessons today. Now I have created this collection of my favorite Spanish jokes.

Dear Friend,

Mastering the Spanish language truly anf fully means that you also have to be able to understand the humor within the Spanish culture. As far as teaching is concerned, Spanish jokes are most difficult to translate, because the joke is often based on a word play that may be absolutely specific to the language.


Just browse through the collection of Spanish Jokes to familiarize yourself with the words and the humor. If you happen to know a good joke and want to give it a go translating it, feel free to send Chris an email or post it on the Facebook page of Spanish Word-a-day. Then everyone will be able to benefit from it! If you are looking for funny Spanish, you may want to check out this collection of funny Spanish phrases.

I hope this will help you learn Spanish online and is a good source for you to learn Spanish for free!

Have fun! Saludos, Chris

Spanish Joke:

Entra un nuevo profe al curso y se presenta:
Buenos días, mi nombre es Largo.
Dice Juancito:
No importa, tenemos tiempo.

 

English Translation:

Spanish Joke:

Estaba Juanito viendo la tele cuando su mamá le grita:
¡Juanito¡ ¿Quién tomó del refrigerador el pastel que iba a compartir en la tarde con las señoras?
Juanito dice:
Yo mamá, se lo di a un niño que estaba hambriento.
La mamá le dice:
Ay que lindo, ¿Y quién era ese niño hijito?
Juanito dice:
¡Yo mamá!

 

English Translation:

Juanito was watching television when his mother yells at him:
Juanito! Who took the cake that I was going to share with the ladies in the afternoon from the refrigerator?
Juanito says:
Me, mother. I gave it to a boy who was very hungry.
The mother says to him:
Oh, how sweet. And who was that boy, my son?
Juanito says:
Me, mother!

Spanish Joke:

Un hombre se despierta súbitamente a las tres de la madrugada, y al sentirse mal, llama a su médico. El galeno llega a su casa y lo examina minuciosamente, haciendo gestos de disgusto.
Por favor, llame a todos sus hijos, a su abogado y a un notario, le dice.
¿Qué tan mal estoy, doctor? ¿Me voy a morir?
El médico responde:
¡Nada de eso! ¡Lo que pasa es que no quiero ser el único estúpido que despiertan a las tres de la madrugada, por gusto!

 

English Translation:

A man wakes up suddenly at three in the morning, and on feeling ill, calls his doctor. The doc arrives at his house and examines him closely, making gestures of displeasure.
Please, call all your children, your lawyer, and a notary, he says.
How ill am I, doctor? Am I going to die?
The physician responds:
None of that! [What's going on is that] I don't want to be the only idiot woken up at three in the morning for someone's pleasure.

Notes:
* madrugada = dawn, very early morning
* galeno = doctor (colloquial)

Spanish Joke:

Érase una pareja de campesinos que después de tanto añorar tener un hijo, al fin consiguieron su cometido. Tuvieron un niño al que le llamaron Tiros.
Tiros creció como cualquier niño normal y, una vez alcanzada la mayoría de edad, se fue para la capital.
Después de algunos meses sin tener noticias de Tiros, el dueño de la tienda del pueblo, que había estado leyendo el periódico, llamó al padre de Tiros diciéndole:
- Compadre, venga a ver esto. Hay noticias de Tiros en el periódico.
El titular decía: "TIROS EN LA UNIVERSIDAD".
El padre de Tiros se puso tan feliz que mató una lechona y celebraron por 3 días el orgullo de que su hijo estuviera en la universidad.
Paso algún tiempo y después volvió el compadre:
- Compadre, noticias de Tiros: "TIROS EN LA LEGISLATURA".
- ¡Oh amigo, mi hijo legislador, vamos a celebrar, yo sabia que ese muchacho llegaba lejos...!"
Y mataron una vaca, festejaron por una semana...
Al tiempo volvieron a tener noticias de Tiros, pero esta vez el compadre le dijo:
- ¡Ay compadre, cómo siento tener que decirle esto! ¡Mejor léalo usted mismo, porque yo no tengo corazón para darle esa noticia tan triste!:
..."ESTUDIANTES Y POLICÍAS SE COGEN A TIROS".

 

English Translation:

Once there was a farmworker couple who, after much yearning for child, finally received their blessing. They had a boy who they called Gunshots.
Gunshots grew up like any normal boy and, once reaching legal age, he left for the capital.
After a few months without news of Gunshots, the owner of a store in the village, who had been reading the newspaper, called Gunshot's father, telling him:
"Compadre, come see this. There's news of Gunshots in the newspaper."
The headline said: "GUNSHOTS IN THE UNIVERSITY."
Gunshot's father was so happy that he killed a pig and they celebrated for three days their pride that Gunshots was in the university.
Some time passed and the compadre returned:
"Compadre, news of Gunshots: 'GUNSHOTS IN THE LEGISLATURE.'"
"Oh friend, my son a legislator! Let us celebrate! I knew that that boy would get far...!"
And they killed a cow and feasted for a week...
Eventually, they again received news of Gunshots, but this time the compadre told him:
"Oh compadre, how I hate to have to tell you this! Better that you should read it yourself, because I don't have the heart to tell you such sad news!"

Headline translation 1: "STUDENTS AND POLICE SEIZE EACH OTHER AT GUNSHOTS."

Headline translation 2: "STUDENTS AND POLICE SEIZE GUNSHOTS."

Notes:
* Érase una vez (Spanish) = Il était une fois (French) = Once upon a time there was (English)
It's a classic story opener.
* cometido = lit. commitment, obligation, charge
* Tiros = lit. shots, implies gunshots (tiros de pistola)
* la mayoria de edad = legal age of maturity
* compadre = lit. godfather, used informally as a term for friends of the family; female equivalent is comadre.